Oh hi, little blog :). Even though I have lots of design material I could and should be sharing with you, I'm going to put it on the back burner for just a little longer (I mean, what's another week?) because I feel compelled to write about something that's been on my mind lately.
For those of you who don't know me personally, my husband Trevor and I got married a few weeks ago, in a private wedding ceremony in Charlottesville, VA. I'm going to go all into the elopement and why we did it and all that jazz at another time, but this is a little more specifically about my experience being a bride.
First of all, you should know that I didn't always think that I would want to elope. It was something that I realized a couple of years ago, but before then I imagined I would do a traditional wedding with guests, tons of flowers (give me ALL the flowers), favors, dinner, brunch, bachelorettes and the whole nine yards. I worked in two bridal boutiques in high school and college, so the vision of what I thought I would look like on my wedding day was always pretty clear. I had lots of time to ponder it while watching soon-to-be-married ladies come in and try on dress after dress. I knew that I would one day wear a lace gown with an illusion neckline, long loose curls, and a floor length veil; I'd also OBVIOUSLY be in the best shape of my life.
Being someone who is involved in design, super detail oriented and at times a (tad) particular about aesthetics, it became clear to me at some point that it would be far too easy for me to get off track while planning a traditional wedding. It was really important to me that my wedding day be about the marriage and not about the place settings or the furniture rentals. Not that it's wrong to be excited about those things. It is exciting! I'll be the first one to say that I love a good wedding. But I knew in my heart that at the end of the day, I wanted to focus on one thing and that was marrying Trevor. For these reasons, I really wanted to be as laid back about everything that day as I possibly could. Including my appearance. I bought my dress online, did my hair and makeup in about 15 minutes and shopped for shoes and earrings the day before we left, but ended up wearing Target sandals because they were easier to walk in outside.
When I got dressed that day, I felt beautiful because it was a beautiful day, literally and figuratively. There was nothing extraordinary about what I was wearing or how my hair looked. It was definitely a step up from my usual jeans and t-shirt, but basically, I looked like me, not a Pinterest bride. I wouldn't trade that Trev and I got to go for a hike (in the loosest sense of the word) through the mountains, have a leisurely, late breakfast together while watching HGTV, play several games of Catch Phrase and sit by the fireplace just so that I would have had more time to get ready or go to a salon. It was a decision that I made based off of how I wanted to spend my time that day. And even so, when we were going through our (insanely amazing and ridiculously gorgeous) wedding photos by Anna Reynal, (who I just need to gush about in an entirely seperate post because I just love and treasure her so much - again, photos will be forthcoming!), I couldn't help but overanalyze every hair on my head and flab on my body. Was I a BRIDE even though I hadn't lost 10 pounds the way you are supposed? Could a BRIDE stand to have her makeup applied [pretty much] the same way she would wear it to work?
The answer is yes, but it's really hard to remember this when you're constantly faced with "10 DAY BRIDAL BOOTCAMP" or "HOW TO NOT LOOK FAT IN YOUR WEDDING DRESS" or "5 WAYS TO LOOK YOUR BEST ON YOUR WEDDING DAY." Because the usual you is not good enough to get married? Do grooms have to go to bridal bootcamp?! Why am I the only one that has to stop drinking beer?! It's not that I think it's wrong to want to look beautiful on your wedding day; it's the immense pressure of what that means to so many of us. And how much it takes the focus off of what matters.
So. FUTURE BRIDES OF AMERICA. PAST BRIDES PICKING YOURSELVES APART. Relax. The sad truth is that in 30 years we will all look back at our wedding photos and most likely wonder what the hell we were wearing anyway. The love and joy will be timeless. <3